9/10/22: ENDINGS ARE BEGINNINGS

Two weeks ago I was about to get on my first solo plane flight to Georgia, and two weeks later I’m getting ready to leave Georgia and head to Nicaragua. The things I have learned from this training camp and from these past couple of weeks, are making me so excited for my new faith journey. let me share 🙂

THINGS I HAVE LEARNED 

• prayer helps!

– to be honest, prayer was never a factor in my life. it was really a thank you god for everything, i pray for this and this, amen. we have had sessions and worship here everyday that has completely reshaped the way i view prayer. something so important that i had never heard before is that prayer is a dialogue, and not a monologue. this is huge! and it has made praying an every day thing, and even just praying when i feel excited, or when i’m feeling very thankful for something. and if you never pray, try it! it has helped me so much here, and it’s so personalized and calming. you can figure so much out about your life with this!

• reading your bible isn’t easy 

– before this trip, i could honestly not tell you one bible verse or any full story in the bible. i always felt like it was too difficult to read, and i didn’t want to start (side note reading has never been my thing:). i have had the same bible since i was young, and although all my 8 year old drawings scribbled across the pages are fun, i wanted something new. i got a new bible this week, and have LOVED reading it. and i’m just as surprised as you are, because anyone that knows me knows i don’t read. and for a good restart, i have been reading it from the very beginning, and am gonna finish it all the way through. this is my dedication to finally getting to know the whole story, and grow my faith through this. i am so excited that i have access to this, and that i’ve finally started to read it.

• your faith is just as important as the person next to you 

– something i have struggled with when coming here are my feelings of lacking knowledge, and feeling like i’m not as  in tune to my faith as other people are. and the truth is, my faith journey is so so important even if i can’t recite passages or i don’t put my hands up during worship. vulnerability has been huge during this trip so far, and i’ve gotten to open up lots about my struggle with this. to someone reading this, if you ever feel the same as me, know that God calls us ALL into a relationship with him. this doesn’t change. it doesn’t matter who you are, what you’ve been through, or what you’ve done. you shouldn’t fear a relationship with him just because you feel guilty, it because you feel undeserving, god forgives, he redeems, and he strengthen. so as i’m here, i’m learning that i am here for a reason, he wants me to be here, and i am forgiven for the things i don’t always talk about. i am so loved, you are so loved, and nothing stands in the way of you and your faith. so wherever you are in your journey, stand tall and  remember to never compare yourself. your faith is your own, and it is SO good. 

• beauty isn’t just defined by your looks

– for me, i have always been a huge makeup and hair person for the majority of my life. I LOVE doing my hair, I LOVE doing my makeup. it had become such a huge part of me, that i literally feel naked without it. coming here i wanted to challenge myself and to be natural, even though i knew i would struggle. covering myself was a way to blend in for me, and i thought that people valued me for my appearance. the truth is, with or without makeup i am the exact same. nothing defines my beauty and nothing i could do makes me less. although i still have been struggling, i finally get to have my curls out in all their frizziness and craziness. and i have been LOVING IT. i have loved waking up and only caring about if my tent has flooded ( another story to tell.) beauty isn’t just your looks, it’s your compassion, it’s your boldness, it’s your leadership, and it’s your heart. i think that every single person i have met have so many individual traits that make them beautiful, and that’s not by society standards. the world had made us believe that there’s a certain way to dress, and to present yourself. but you are so. perfect and special JUST the way you are. god made you in his own image, he loves your skin, you hair, your smile, and every imperfection to you is a perfect addition to him. your beauty is you, and all of the things that make up you. 

• don’t put your tent on a downward slope!

– as much as i want to tell you my camping experience has been fun, it actually sucked and i’m terrible at it! to my parents, my tent actually looked the same as my room, so i actually couldn’t even see that all of my stuff was wet! the first day staying in  a tent was FUN, it was dry, the beautiful blue sky was  out, the birds were chirping. then the rest of the two weeks came, and it was basically a rain party every single day. and as much as i love rain, i wasn’t a huge fan of the bugs, mud, and flooding that took place. but, i finally organized and cleaned my tent, and they let us move our tents to the pavillion to dry. thank god! and i am so glad that everyone here doesn’t pay attention to me, because hopefully no one knows that i‘ve worn the same outfit for the past three days 🙂 but tip from me, when staying in a tent, and it gets flooded, do ‘t try and move your tent with all your stuff in it, because you will actually rip holes in your tent and cause EVEN more problems. but cute purple ducktape and an hour of sun have gone far.

• bucket showers and bucket laundry are fun

– let me paint an image in your head. it’s a long day of being sweaty and dirty, it’s rainy and humid, and you’re SO READY to take a shower. and everyone around you thinks the same! there is nothing more refreshing than filling up a lowes bucket with hose water, going in your individual outdoor stall filled with spiders and grass, and getting that shower you were waiting for. a week ago i would’ve told you that that sounded miserable. but now i could tell you that bucket showers ARE SO FUN, and even better when you have your friends and some justin bieber to make the moment. the second week of being here they let us start taking scheduled showers in the shower containers, but i think the bucket showers (although humbling) MAKE the experience. i will miss all the days of excess shampoo being in my hair, and getting bit by mosquitos the whole time<3 and BUCKET LAUNDRY!! WOOO!!!!!! from this experience i can confidently say that this is the first time by laundry has stayed wet for a whole week, and it wasn’t just because i forgot to move it to the dryer for a week!! it has been such an experience although rough sometimes, but i am so happy i lived like this. 

• never take a toilet for granted / anything for granted

– portapotty’s portapotty’s portapotty’s! i’m scared of these things! coming on my world race journey i never thought i would have to see them so much! this training camp has taught me to say goodbye to my comforts, to my bed, to my loved ones, to my shower, my toilet! as first it was a struggle, but it’s been such a lesson for me. i think that if we don’t take a step away from everything we’re blessed with, then we never really realize how much of a blessing they really are. going to Central America, there’s people who have close to nothing. and although we have been blessed with so much, god gave us these gifts to share with people. on my mission trip, i pray that i am utilized to share what i have been blessed with.  never take anything for granted, you are so blessed for what you’re given. 

 

with going forward, i am so thankful for all of the lessons i have learned at this training camp. i am finally feeling closer to my group, and have been making some exciting friendships. it is so cool to me that i get to do life with all of these people, just as eager to grow in their faith. these girls (and the two wills) have gone through their own struggles here, but we all get to go through it together. it has been so eye opening to see all of the ways that God can impact you, and the people around you. i have realized he listens to our prayers, and he wants a relationship with us so badly. side note: there are multiple groups here for world race! we all are going for different lengths of trips, to different countries, and to different fields to work at. it is so amazing to see how much growth and connection all of these groups have gotten with just a short amount of time. through worship, squad wars, team bondings, etc we have all grown so much with each other. we call our individual team m3 standing for mighty 3. we decided this close to the beginning, because our first night here already had some god moments. i remember our first debrief and how we were talking about bible verses, and our leaders praying over us before we left. the bible verses all had 3 in them, one of the girls said she kept having the number 3 in her head before she came, i had been seeing that number lots, and i looked at the time and it was directly on the 3. i think God had a sense of humor, and he does things that are little but don’t go unnoticed. there has also been so many testimonies here, healing, and honestly. He has shown UP here, and i am so ready for all of the ways that he’ll move us for our journey. thank you for your support and answering my prayers. god called me here and you all were a huge part, and the reason i get to have this experience! it is so life changing already, and i am ready to teach what i have learned. please pray for me on this journey, as i will be praying for all of you! you are so loved, stay blessed!